Horrible Harry and the Triple Revenge Read online

  Mrs. Hadad smiled. “Well, Sidney, since you are an insect, you will like these Lebanese cookies. They have honey in them.”

  Sidney dropped a handful of marshmallows in his cocoa. “I will, thank you,” he replied. Then he carefully leaped back to his desk.

  Harry leaned back in his chair and flashed his white teeth.

  His second revenge was done!

  Now, I wondered, how far would Harry go for the third one?

  The Third Revenge!

  The next morning, when we lined up to go into the school, Harry announced his news.

  “Guess what? I’m going to be nine on February sixth! Grandma is giving me a birthday party.”

  “No kidding?” I said. “That’s so cool. What are you going to do?”

  “It’s a surprise,” Harry said. “Grandma is taking us all to a special place in her Goog Mobile.”

  “Goog Mobile?” Mary and Ida shouted.

  “It’s a van named after his cat, The Goog,” I explained.

  “What’s it look like?” Mary asked.

  “Does it have whiskers?” Ida added.

  “When you ride in it, you’ll see,” Harry replied.

  “It’s awesome!” I said. “I’ve seen it before in Harry’s garage.”

  ZuZu and Dexter joined our conversation. Sidney looked on a few steps away.

  “I’ve got the invitations with me today,” Harry said in a low voice. He patted his back pocket. It was bulging. “I’m passing them out now before school. Read them after school, and don’t talk about them. You know Miss Mackle says no handing out party invitations

  in the classroom. It’s rude. This is yours, Doug.”

  “Thanks,” I said. “I like the cow sticker on the front.” Then I put it in my pocket.

  “Moo,” Harry replied with a grin.

  “This is yours, Song Lee,” Harry said.

  She tucked the invitation inside her flowered purse. Song Lee never talked about going to a party in front of other

  people who weren’t going. She wouldn’t want someone to feel bad about not being invited.

  Mary and Ida waited for their invitations. They smiled when Harry handed them each one.

  “I can’t wait to go to Harry’s party,” Mary said. “I know it will be different! Look! Even the envelope is different. It has a silly cow sticker!”

  “Moo!” Ida giggled. “I love cows!”

  Sidney stepped forward with his hand out.

  Harry reached behind him. “This is yours, ZuZu. And yours, Dexter.”

  When the bell rang, we started to walk into the building. Sidney lagged behind with Harry and me. “You didn’t give me mine.”

  “No, I didn’t,” Harry said.

  Sidney paused, then dropped his head.

  “Now you know how it feels to be crushed,” Harry said. “Like Song Lee’s praying mantis.”

  Sidney locked eyes with Harry. “I’m sorry I stepped on that oragummy bug!”

  “You need to say that to someone else, Sid!” Harry snapped. “Not me!”

  Sidney walked into the classroom with his shoulders humped over.

  Harry’s third revenge was the worst! Sidney didn’t get an invitation to the party.

  Later that morning, during writing, I noticed Sidney was folding some green construction paper.

  Harry was drawing a picture of Apple Man to go with his story, “The Adventures of Apple Man.”

  Song Lee was writing a poem.

  I was writing about Pajama Day.

  Suddenly Sidney walked over to Song Lee and handed her the crumpled-up green paper.

  Harry and I looked up and listened to his conversation with Song Lee.

  “This is for you,” Sidney said. “I never realized how hard it was to fold paper to make a praying mantis. I’m really sorry I stepped on your oragummy. It was a rotten thing to do.”

  Song Lee held the green folded paper in the palms of her hands. It didn’t look like a praying mantis. It looked like a big blob.

  “It’s okay,” Song Lee said. “I can make another one. I feel better now.”

  “Do you forgive me?”

  “Of course,” Song Lee said with a warm smile. “Friends forgive each

  other when they say they’re sorry. I can tell you really mean it.”

  Sidney quickly wiped his eyes and went back to his seat. When he got there, he took out a Kleenex from his desk and blew his nose.

  Harry got up to sharpen his pencil.

  On his way back to his seat, he pulled out a white envelope from his back pocket and dropped it on Sidney’s desk.

  Sidney smiled when he saw what was on the front: a cow sticker!

  It was an invitation to Harry’s birthday party!

  “Moo!” Sidney blurted out, then he quickly covered his mouth. When Miss Mackle looked over, Sid quickly apologized. “Sorry!”

  Sid tucked the invitation away in his backpack. He remembered Harry’s instructions.

  As soon as Harry sat down, I leaned over and whispered, “You had Sid’s invitation all along?”

  Harry nodded.

  “You were planning to give it to Sid?” I asked.

  “Yup, but not until three o’clock.” Harry grinned. “I wanted him to suffer a little bit. But . . . I changed my mind.”

  I nodded.

  I knew why.

  Cow-Patty Party

  Harry’s ninth-birthday invitation was weird. It was brown and round.

  And it was gross.

  It was a cow patty.

  There was a half-written poem inside that said:

  Use your noodle.

  Think of a barn.

  We’re going to party

  At the _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ !

  What rhymes with “barn”? I thought. Beats me!

  I couldn’t wait for the Goog Mobile to pick me up that Saturday at two o’clock. When I saw the big Volkswagen van turn the corner, I knew it was the Goog Mobile. There were flowers painted all over it, and on the side there was a big picture of Harry’s cat.

  Honk! Honk!

  I waved good-bye to my mom, then ran out to the van.

  Everyone else was inside, even Grandpa Spooger. His wheelchair was in the back. He and Harry’s grandma sat in the front. Seven kids were strapped into the three rows of seats in the van.

  “Hi, you guys!” I said, sitting next to Harry in the second row.

  “This van is so cool!” Dexter said. “How old is it, Grandma Spooger?”

  “I had it during my college days at Berkeley,” she said. “During the sixties.”

  “Wow!” ZuZu said. “That means this Goog Mobile is about forty years old!”

  “We take good care of it,” Grandma Spooger said.

  I noticed everyone had a present on their lap for Harry except Sidney. His was on the floor. He said it was too heavy to lift.

  “Where are we going?” Mary asked.

  “I gave you two clues on the invitation,” Harry said. “The cow sticker and my poem. What rhymes with ‘barn’?”

  “There aren’t too many words that rhyme with ‘barn,’” Mary grumbled.

  “Darn!” ZuZu replied. Then he laughed.

  Grandpa Spooger laughed, too. “L-looks l-like you f-f-fooled them, H-Harry!”

  “I did, Grandpa. But they even had a third clue. That invitation was one big cow patty. Where do you find those things?”

  “I p-put one in m-my d-d-dad’s mailbox once,” Grandpa Spooger said. “We u-used to l-l-live on a f-farm in Indiana.”

  Song Lee giggled the loudest.

  As the Goog Mobile passed grazing cows in the countryside, Mary called out, “I know. We’re going to a farm!”

  “All right!” Harry exclaimed. “You finally got it! The Milk Farm!”

  ZuZu got out his invitation and read the poem with the two missing words:

  Use your noodle.

  Think of a barn.

  We’re going to party

  At the MilkFarm!

 
; Mary made a face. “Harry Spooger! ‘Farm’ and ‘barn’ do not rhyme!”

  “They almost do,” Song Lee said. “It’s still a fun poem.”

  Harry flashed Song Lee a toothy smile. “Dibs on sitting next to you at the party,” he said.

  Song Lee’s face turned rosy red.

  “Dibs on sitting next to the birthday boy!” Sidney added.

  Harry rolled his eyeballs, but he didn’t object.

  It was exciting when we finally arrived at the Milk Farm! A huge wooden cow stood on the roof holding a gigantic strawberry ice-cream cone.

  “Okay, everyone out,” Grandma Spooger said. “Stay together now. We have a table reserved inside.”

  Everyone took their present with them to the Milk Farm. ZuZu and Dexter helped Sidney carry his. “Why is this so heavy?” ZuZu asked.

  “You’ll see,” Sid said.

  Grandma Spooger helped Grandpa Spooger into his wheelchair.

  “L-let’s e-eat!” Grandpa Spooger said.

  Harry pushed his grandfather in his wheelchair carefully to the barn. I held the door as they went inside.

  Grandma Spooger went back to the van for the cake. It was in one of her A-1 Cakes boxes.

  “There’s an ice-cream smorgasbord up there. Go help yourself, kids. Make yourself a super sundae,” she said.

  We all got in line and made our creations. Sid’s had the most stuff on it. Song Lee put nine strawberries on her sundae. I made a banana split. When Mary just ordered a Kiddy Cone, Harry said, “That’s what I’m bringing home for The Goog.” Mary just rolled her eyes as she licked her cone.

  Harry chuckled as he made two hot chocolate fudge sundaes with whipped cream and nuts. One for his grandpa and one for himself.

  After we enjoyed the ice cream, Grandma Spooger took out the cake she had baked for Harry’s birthday.

  It was horrible!

  But Harry loved it!

  The cake was inside a new litter box. The frosting had vanilla cookie crumbs with green sprinkles. The top was dotted with little Tootsie Rolls. One was hanging over the pan.

  “Eweeyeee!” five of us said as Grandma Spooger got out a new pooper-scooper for serving the cake.

  Harry and Sidney and Song Lee loved it. They clapped their hands and giggled!

  “I don’t think I can eat Harry’s birthday cake,” Mary said.

  “Me neither,” Ida and Dexter said.

  “Maybe we should open the presents first,” Grandma Spooger suggested. “We can cut the cake and sing ‘Happy Birthday’ a little later.”

  Harry didn’t object. He dived into all the presents. He loved each one. I gave him a copy of Stone Fox, my favorite book. It’s about an exciting dogsled race.

  Song Lee made him a collection of origami insects, and included the origami book. The one on top was a praying mantis.

  “Be careful with that one,” Sid said.

  Song Lee beamed.

  Mary gave him a pair of pajamas with cows on them. Ida gave him a set of rubbery reptiles and amphibians. Harry liked the red salamander best. Dexter gave him an Elvis CD. And ZuZu gave him the board game Clue.

  Everyone was curious about Sidney’s gift. It took two people to set it on the table. Its shape was big and weird.

  “What do you think it is?” ZuZu asked.

  “I already know,” Harry said. “I asked Sid for it Thursday after school.”

  “You did?” Mary said.

  “Yup. His stepdad works at Stone Memorials next to the cemetery. I asked for a leftover piece.”

  Everyone leaned forward as Harry tore off the birthday paper.

  “A small boulder?” I said.

  “Yup. Mr. LaFleur engraved my name and age in the granite rock. I’m keeping it in my bedroom. I’m going to sit on it and think of cool things to do.”

  “Oooooh,” we all ooohed as Harry lowered the small boulder to the floor and sat on top of it.

  “So, what are you thinking about now?” ZuZu asked.

  “My birthday wish.” Then Harry jumped off the rock and stood tall. “Got it!”

  And that’s when Grandma Spooger lit the candles on the cake and we sang “Happy Birthday.” Harry blew out all nine candles with one breath.

  Everyone did take a piece of the kitty-litter cake, although Mary didn’t finish hers. Only Harry, Sid, and Song Lee ate the Tootsie Rolls.

  It’s hard to believe a week that started out so terrible could end up to be such fun.

  But that’s what happens when friends forgive each other. And that’s what life can be like with Harry in Room 3B.

  Harry’s Horrible Birthday Cake Recipe

  Kitty-Litter Cake

  Ingredients:

  2 marble cake mixes

  vanilla frosting

  12 sugar cookies

  green sprinkles

  12 small Tootsie Rolls (Midges)

  Directions: 1. Bake both cake mixes together in one large pan. Since doubling may require more cooking time, test with a toothpick. If it comes out clean, it’s done.

  2. Place cooled cake in a new, clean kitty-litter pan.

  3. Frost with vanilla frosting.

  4. Crush the sugar cookies with a rolling pin. Sprinkle the crumbs on top of the frosting.

  5. Add the green sprinkles on top.

  6. Heat Tootsie Rolls in the microwave until soft (about 15 seconds). Drape the Tootsie Rolls on top of the frosting with the cookie crumbs. Hang one over the edge of the pan.

  7. Serve with a brand-new pooper scooper.

  Lebanese Cookie Recipe

  Ingredients:

  1/3 cup cooking oil

  1/2 cup butter, softened

  1/3 cup sugar

  1 tablespoon orange juice

  1 teaspoon baking powder

  1/2 teaspoon baking soda

  2 cups all-purpose flour

  3/4 cup sugar

  1/3 cup honey

  1/2 cup water

  1/3 cup finely chopped walnuts

  Directions:1. Beat cooking oil into butter.

  2. Beat in sugar.

  3. Add orange juice, baking powder, and baking soda. Mix well.

  4. Add flour, a little at a time, to make soft dough.

  5. Shape dough into 2-inch ovals and place on an ungreased baking sheet.

  6. Bake at 350 degrees for 20 to 25 minutes or until golden.

  7. Cool cookies on a rack.

  8. Meanwhile, in a saucepan, combine the sugar, honey, and water. Bring to a boil. Boil gently, uncovered, for 5 minutes.

  9. Dip cooled cookies into the warm syrup.

  10. Sprinkle immediately with nuts.

  11. Dry on rack.